I am indebted to fellow bloggist and Lenny-fan Cosmic Connie and her whirled musings for inspiring today's post.
Connie has been following and reporting the antics of Germany's worst social faux pas since another small man with a stupid 'tash said he could "make the trains run on time" for many years and has been the butt of the weasely little butt-head's butt-hurt on many occasions. Over the years Connie has put up with death threats, gratuitous and rampantly misogynistic abuse and cretinous accusations of killing Lenny's mutt amongst other things and lately an obviously vexatious lawsuit and harassment by his incompetent and apparently insane 'legal team'... But she's still here... And still biting Coldwell's arse... Pop over to her cosmic realm and say 'Hi!'
Connie posted a link a link to Loony's German language IBMS (Idiocy Based Morons School) website which, apart from looking like it was designed by a colour blind platypus contains these stirring words.... Don't worry... Theres a translation later..
"Diese Webseite wird von Amerika aus nach amerikanischen Recht betrieben. Der Server und das Webteam sind in der USA.
Basierend auf einem alten Hitler Gesetz, darf ein Ausländer seinen rechtmässigen Doktortitel in Deutschland nicht führen.
Bedingt durch den Fakt, dass Leonard Coldwell keine Nostrifikation in Deutschland beantragt hat und in Deutschland auch nicht als Doktor tätig ist, trägt er diesen Titel nicht in Deutschand. Alle Referenzen auf seinem Doktortitel sind dashalb nur in der USA gültig. Er führt diesen Titel auch nur in der USA. Dr. Leonard Coldwell hat keinen Einfluss darauf, wie ihn andere nennen oder anreden.
Der Spitzname Dr. C ist ein eingetragenes Warenzeichen und rechtlich als TM Geschützt. Es kann nicht als Titel gewertet werden, zumal wir hier klar darauf hinweisen, dass Dr. Leonard Coldwell, NC, USA, seine in den USA rechtmässigen Titel und Anerkennungen nicht in Deutschland trägt. Dr. C ist ein Motivations und Selbsthilfe Coach."
Excellent stuff I'm sure you'll agree but if, like me, you failed your German O Level... Or to be more accurate didn't even bother turning up... It'll probably make more sense in English... And if you don't understand English you're probably on the wrong blog... So here's a free translation thanks to people who understand the Hun-Tongue slightly better than I...
"This website is based in America and governed by US law. The server and web-team are in the US.
Based on an old Hitler law, a foreigner must not lead to its rightful doctorate in German(?)
Due to the fact that Leonard Coldwell has not requested any recognition of his degrees in Germany and does not act as a doctor in Germany he does not have the title of doctor in Germany. All references to his doctorate are therefore only valid in the US. Dr Leonard Coldwell has no influence over what other's call him or the titles they give him.
The nickname Dr. C is a registered trademark and protected by law as a trademark. It can not be regarded as a title, especially as we have clearly indicated here that Dr. Leonard Coldwell (is in) NC, United States and lawful US titles and recognitions are not (necessarily) valid in Germany.
Dr. C is a motivational and self-help coach"
So there you have it... From the horses
You also have to admire the sheer front of creating a website plastered with "Doctor" and "Dr" left right and centre and then claiming it's not your fault if people call you "Doctor" even if you're not exactly a real doctor in the first place.
But there's another way, way, way bigger problem here.... He's claiming he's not sought German recognition for his 'degrees' which is to be expected as he doesn't have any apart from a psychology 'doctorate' from Columbia State University, a long defunct diploma mill and an equally dodgy honorary doctor of humanities from the equally dodgy Louisiana Baptist University. The big problem, as far as Lenny's bullshit is concerned is his own claim on his own bio website that...
So on the one hand he's claiming to have converted his German qualifications into American qualifications but on the other hand he says he's not converted them back again into German qualifications... What happened to the original German qualifications Leonard?
Now... I must admit that just like Lenny I don't have a degree, a masters or a doctorate... I have six average O levels, a cycling proficiency badge and an expired H.G.V licence... But I know people who do have all of those things and I'm pretty sure that when a foreign system accepts your evidence of learnedness... Is that even a word?.. They don't tear up your doctorate and give you a new one... It's not like changing currency where you swap your Pounds Sterling for USD... You actually get to keep both...
So we've established that as far as German law is concerned he's not a doctor and does not have the right to call himself a doctor... But don't I remember him saying...
"After sixteen years as a General Practitioner in Europe, Dr. Coldwell left general practice to concentrate on his applied research in stress and stress related diseases, with particular emphasis on cancer and other so-called incurable diseases."Yes.. I f**king do... That's all over the intertubes including his own webshites... So which is it Lenny? Were you lying when you claimed to have been in general practice for 16 years or did you practice medicine without any qualifications for 16 years... Actually we all know what the answer is... You're a bare-face liar who can't keep his story straight for ten seconds.
Oh... And by the way... Perhaps you might want to edit your utterly pathetic and incompetently doctored Berlin dentist conference attendance 'certificate' because according to that you were calling yourself "Dr Leonard Coldwell" in Germany in 1994.
Leonard Coldwell... Doesn't know his arse from his elbow and doesn't mind proving it.